


cheer me up (come on and dance with me)

by chemicalpixie



Category: The Magicians (TV)
Genre: Canon-Typical Violence, Character Death, F/F, F/M, M/M, Multi, Polyamory, Polyamory Negotiations
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-02
Updated: 2017-08-02
Packaged: 2018-12-10 01:38:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,103
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11681322
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chemicalpixie/pseuds/chemicalpixie
Summary: ““look,” she begins. we summoned some kind of killer mothman together. let's go get coffee. or something.” she looks almost unsure of herself for a moment, and it's the first time that quentin's seen kady so vulnerable.”or; quentin finds himself tumbling head-first into his first relationship. with two different people. at the same time. what could possibly go wrong?





	cheer me up (come on and dance with me)

**Author's Note:**

> this is basically all my ships shoved into one fic. i am sorry. i am so sorry. also @ femslash side of the magicians fandom why is there no alice/kady content? listen they'd be Good. also i am the queen of run-on sentences. and summarizing an entire season and a half very quickly because frankly i've written one 10k one-shot and that was enough for me. i started this fic when i finished s1 and then promptly depressed myself by killing off {redacted} and then put it down until the welters challenge ship week. also don't ask me how canon works without {redacted} i've put as much thought into this fic as i intend to. i don't know how {x event} works without redacted. please don't ask me.
> 
> the title of this fic comes from “cheer me up” from victorious which i never watched but i heard the song on a magicians playlist and it's really pretty catchy. also if you're looking for a quentin + depression anthem try “lying beast” by run river north. please kudos and comment if you enjoy, it means a lot to me! thanks!

quentin and alice are being dragged along by eliot and margo to the physical kids' cottage when kady rushes into their path, almost literally jumping in front of them. she has a grip on penny's hand as she drags him behind her. “look,” she begins. we summoned some kind of killer mothman together. let's go get coffee. or something.” she looks almost unsure of herself for a moment, and it's the first time that quentin's seen kady so vulnerable. penny rolls his eyes. 

“come on, babe, they're obviously not into it,” he says, attempting to leave. kady stays steadfast in front of quentin and alice.

“you call her babe? that's so cute,” margo says in a tone that implies it's really not cute at all. penny glares at her.

“um, sure,” quentin says, surprising himself. “uh, not now though. i think eliot wanted to show us something?” he turns back towards eliot for confirmation, but eliot just shakes his head.

“go ahead,” he says, raising his eyebrows and smirking. “whatever comes of this will certainly be more interesting than an afternoon at the cottage.”

“okay then,” kady says, grinning, linking arms with alice, who looks vaguely uncomfortable. “let's go.”

//

a half hour later, they're settled into a cozy booth at the coffee shop in the library. it's a little too cozy, in quentin's opinion. he can feel penny's leg pressing into his own leg and he's maybe trying a little too hard not to think about what's in between penny's legs and— “oh my god, quentin, stop thinking about my dick,” penny snaps. kady snorts a little and alice looks a little shocked.

“quentin?” alice whispers.

“it was nothing. my mind just started wandering and i —”

“don't lie, pretty boy,” penny snaps.

“pretty boy?” quentin asks, a little affronted.

“i called you white boy,” penny retorts.

“no, you didn't,” alice says.

kady grins like a cat who has caught a mouse. “i'm not psychic, alice, so i gotta ask. are you thinking about me?”

“what? no?” alice says, sounding a little too scandalized in her response for kady to believe her. kady in response just arches her eyebrows.

“what's this about, anyways?” quentin asks.

“so. like. i like penny, right?” kady says, and alice nods. kady and penny have been dating or something since the first day when they kicked quentin out of the room so they could have sex. “and you like quentin, alice,” kady continues, and alice nods. “and like. i'm bi, and so is penny—”

“hey!” penny snaps at kady. “when i agreed to this i didn't know you'd be outing me to these losers.”

“it doesn't matter,” alice says gently, reaching over the table to put her hand on penny's arm gently. penny rolls his eyes. “i'm pan, anyways.” kady smirks at this, though quentin isn't exactly sure why.

“uh, i'm not sure if this is relevant, but i'm pretty sure i'm straight,” quentin adds, which he is. if he doesn't count the dreams and that one time he made out with eliot and he was pretty sure he liked it. like. really liked it.

“i can hear your thoughts, dumbass,” penny snaps. “none of that shit you're thinking sounds straight to me.”

kady smiles like a cat that was toying with a mouse. “what're you thinking about, quentin?”

“it's none of your business,” quentin snaps. “look, i don't know what you wanted out of this, kady, but i don't think you're going to get it. i have to go. goodbye, alice.” quentin stands, making a mental note to never talk to any of them again, shooting a quick i'm-sorry-you're stuck-in-this-booth look at alice and heads to the physical kids' cottage.

//

“so what did they want?” margo drawls, her head on eliot's lap, the two of them seemingly already three drinks ahead of everyone else in the room and none the worse for wear for it.

“well, uh. alice is pan, and she didn't trust me enough to tell me that, and uh, apparently penny thinks i want to fuck him because i thought about his dick for one goddamn second,” quentin snaps, before sinking down into a chair across from where margo and eliot are laying.

“do you want to fuck him?” eliot asks, his tone full of wonder.

“no. i mean. probably not. i mean yeah, his lips are really pretty but it's not like i think about kissing him to get him to stop making those stupid smartass comments or anything.”

margo and eliot just look bemused. “honey,” margo says gently. “it sounds like you're not straight. straight people don't think about kissing people of the same sex, even if they just _really_ want them to shut up.”

“how do you know?” quentin snaps.

“i went through my gay awakening already, sweetheart. i got all this shit figured out senior year of high school,” margo says, smirking still. “though, i guess since i'm pan, it was technically a pan awakening, but that really doesn't have as good a ring to it.”

“fine. i guess i'm bi then. i don't know. do straight people really like making out with members of the opposite sex?”

margo rolls her eyes. “no.” eliot shakes his head.

“uh. yeah. i guess i'm bi then,” quentin says, and eliot cheers.

“a drink, todd! for quentin's bi awakening, which we all knew was coming sooner or later.”

margo elbows him. “you just hoped it was because you think he's cute.”

“he is, though,” eliot protests.

margo rolls her eyes. “he's not _that_ cute.”

“hey,” quentin protests, without much effort. margo just hands him a shot.

“drink up, q.”

//

quentin wakes up the next morning with a massive hangover, and thanks whatever god that there is that class is still cancelled because he helped summon a killer mothman who ripped out the dean's eyeballs. the sun is shining on his face, which is unusual, he thinks, because he doesn't sleep near the window in his dorm, and then he realizes. he's still at the cottage. he must've crashed here last night after having too much to drink. he has vague flashes of trying to make out with some kid to prove he's bi (though he's not quite sure who he was trying to prove it to. himself, maybe?). when he finally musters up the energy to stand, he stumbles into the kitchen, where eliot and margo are making eggs.

“good morning, sunshine,” eliot says cheerily.

“i hate you two and the sun and everything making noise,” quentin says, sitting down at the table. margo makes a cup of coffee magically slide across the table. “thanks,” quentin says, genuinely grateful.

“so, listen, q,” margo says. “el and i were thinking. you should talk to alice and penny and kady.”

“no,” quentin says. he'd say it louder, with more protest, but he thinks if he talks above a whisper his head might explode.

“q, listen,” margo says. “i'm not stupid. it'll be good to just clear the air, at least.”

“fine,” quentin says, though he thinks at this point he might just agree to anything if it will get margo and eliot to _justshutup_.

//

he texts everyone to meet him by the willows near the welters building at one, and it feels like his whole body is buzzing with anxiety at twelve forty-five. when he arrives, still ten minutes early, everyone else is already there.

“okay, so listen,” he begins, but kady cuts him off.

“listen, quentin,” she says. “i like penny. penny likes me. you like penny. penny likes you, as much as he hates to admit it. at the very least, he thinks you're pretty in a i'd-like-to-kiss-you-senseless-so-i-can't-hear-your-stupid-thoughts anymore way, which. well, works, i guess. and you like alice and i like alice and penny likes alice. and i'm not that keen on you, romantically or sexually, but i figure we can just be friends. it's not like this would make sense even if the two of us were also dating.”

“um. well. i mean.” quentin stammers. he is literally at a loss for words. his mind is rushing and it's. it's showing him things he really doesn't want to see, like kady and alice and him and penny (oh, god, him and penny) and alice and penny and—

“oh my god, man, get some damn wards,” penny snaps, and kisses him. quentin's stunned, he's a little stiff at first, but then he leans back and relaxes, and sure the tree bark is a little rough on his back, but _damn_ , can penny kiss.

kady wolf-whistles, and penny stops kissing him. they send synchronized glares in kady's direction, and she just grins.

“so. i guess we're all dating now?” alice asks, half-shy and half-giddy.

“sure,” penny says, settling back down into the grass. “also kady wants to fuck this other girl she knows but she won't tell me how she knows her, so there's that.”

kady shoves him. “hey.”

“so, like. are we supposed to want to fuck her too?” quentin asks. kady glares at him.

“no. plus, i'm pretty sure she's a lesbian, so the only one who would even be eligible is alice. look. i won't date her if you guys aren't cool with that, okay? this is how poly shit works. we all gotta talk about this crap, okay.”

“listen, uh, i'm not even attracted to you, so i don't mind if you have something else going on,” quentin says.

penny shrugs. “i already gotta share you with these losers.”

“yeah, you can,” alice says quickly and softly. “does this mean i can have another relationship, too?”

“alice's got a crush,” penny singsongs, and she glares at him. not in a mean way. more a shut-the-fuck-up-you-adorable-loser kind of way.

“who is it?” quentin asks.

alice blushes before responding. “margo.”

“i didn't think she was your type,” quentin says.

“no offense, quentin, but you thought i was straight,” alice says.

penny laughs, and alice pulls eliot's never-ending flask out of her bag.

“did you steal that?” kady asks, looking almost impressed.

“no,” alice says. “i found it. i was going to give it back, but —” she shrugs. “to this poly mess,” she finally says, and takes a drink before passing it to penny, who drinks and passes it to kady, who, grinning, downs a gulp and then passes it to quentin. the afternoon ends with the burn of liquor and happiness in his throat.

//

and there's the trials. they all pass the first two easily, and celebrate with a night of drunk making out which switches who is making out with who so easily it feels like a game of musical chairs. quentin ends up with kady, tired and cuddly, on his lap after penny shoves her off on him and steals alice back when kady's too tired or too drunk to want to kiss him anymore.

“hey q,” she whispers in his ear. “i love this so much.” quentin plays with her hair and stays silent. she seems like she's going to say more. “but they're gonna find me. i'm a liar, q. why do you think i know battle magic?”

“you're not a liar, k,” quentin says.

“i am though,” she insists, words slurring together (though whether it's due to tiredness or alcohol, quentin isn't sure). “i'm a liar.” and then she's asleep on his lap, and quentin can see alice and penny have passed out across the room with alice wrapped in penny's arms and quentin smiles because he didn't ever really think he'd get here (he spent so many of his teen years with a hopeless crush he knew was hopeless even before she came out to him and thinking he was unloveable that he never really thought it through to here, to having three other people who love him for _whoheis_ ) before he drifts off to sleep.

//

the third trial is harder. but quentin doesn't even have time to complain, because soon they're in brakebills south, and penny's pissed off at kady, and they can't even talk about it because they can't fucking talk (though quentin wonders if it has to do with what kady said to him, drunk and sleepy, the night before their third trial), and quentin's tired of this on day two, and then they're foxes for some reason and there's fox sex and it's just awkward to think about once he's human again, and as they're leaving, quentin notices kady isn't there. on the way back to the cottage, quentin asks penny, with alice gripping his hand like the world is _broken_.

“don't know, don't fucking care,” penny growls, and alice's eyes burn.

“look, penny, you can't bottle shit up anymore. it's not just you and kady anymore. this is our shit, not just yours.”

“i wasn't fucking lying. i don't know where she is. i don't give a shit. she let me in her mind, alice. she's the only person whose mind i've never gotten a fucking glimpse of, and she let me in, and we were gonna fix it. we were going to fix everything and i would've told you two but you were off having fucking fox sex or some shit, and then she left me. she left us.” his voice breaks.

the three of them spend the night, drunk and crying, in alice's room. quentin wakes up in the morning, and he can still feel the sting of salty tears rolling down his cheeks.

//

and penny vanishes next, after they find the button, until quentin sees him in a dream and they rescue him. it turns out that he hasn't abandoned them and so then they go to fillory, and they have to kill the beast, they have to, and quentin gets left behind in the neitherlands and goes, tumbling, back onto earth, where he finds julia and they make it back in time for the battle and the adventure. and alice drinks ember's fucking semen, or something, and they try to fight but they're all dying and then julia makes a deal and rips the beast away from them and quentin can't even be mad about it because they almost fucking died, and penny doesn't have functioning hands anymore, because the beast cut them off and then he badmouthed the riverwatcher.

and then they've finally got the beast back, and they're trapping him when suddenly quentin realizes that kady and julia are trapped there with him, and he breaks the spell and alice fires at the beast, but it only hits his shoulder, and kady's screaming “i'm sorry, i'm sorry, i'm so fucking sorry,” while julia screams about how they took reynard away from her, and alice stops for a moment, to ask kady why and the beast is on top of her, and her wrist is bubbling, scarring, and quentin stops because he suddenly realizes alice is going to die as kady screams “do you think i wanted to leave you guys? it was either that or forget brakebills. forget you.” she sounds like a woman who is desperate to talk, desperate as though her voice is going to be ripped away from her at any moment, quentin thinks, and then he realizes that she wants alice to know why before she is ripped apart. kady blasts the beast off alice with battle magic quentin's only seen her do once before but he's prepared for her this time, and doesn't take the hit as hard (not that he really took it too hard in the first place) and alice does the rhinemann ultra, or she tries, and she's consumed with blue fire.

and julia and penny are gone again, and quentin didn't even see them go and he wishes penny was here, wishes penny was here as his whole world was being torn apart, with alice burnt into ashes and kady sobbing, and alice comes back, blue fire crackling under her skin, and rips the beast apart, and kady's sobbing on her knees and alice grins, sparking and crackling. she turns to kady and kady just has time to whisper “alice,” before alice rips her apart and kady's corpse lies there, heartless. quentin screams, despite himself, and then alice turns, eyes hungry and full of burning blue fire.

“please, please,” he's begging, eyes wide and scared and then he remembers. the caecodemon. he can't do this. he can't. but then he sees eliot's frightened face and the tears streaming down margo's face as they scream alice's name, and then alice whispers, voice low and cool and full of fury.

“you're talking like you mean something to me,” she says, a thin smile appearing on her face.

“alice,” margo cries. “alice, it's me. margo. your girlfriend. alice, please,” she begs, sobbing, and then the two of them are choking and alice's hand is barely moving but he knows she's doing it and the look of fright on their faces is almost palpable, and quentin knows what he has to do. he has to do this. he has to. there is no other choice (other than letting his friend and sort-of-friend-sort-of-something-more die. he thinks about it for a minute, about letting them die and then watching alice turn on him so he won't hurt this way anymore, won't ache at the loss of kady lying dead on the ground and penny and his childhood friend gone to who-knows-where and he thinks he wouldn't have to hurt anymore and then he realizes. what kind of monster would this make him? what kind of monster _is_ he?)

“quentin says go free,” he whispers, and then he watches what's left of his world end right before his eyes.

//

he wakes up with the centaurs. penny's there too, and they run to each other, crying and embracing and then penny's pulling his hair for some reason and before quentin has time to think penny's untangled himself from quentin and is begging him to cut his hands off. quentin does. it's safe to say this is not on the top ten list of good things quentin has ever done. it does not even make top twenty. it probably goes on the top five list of worst things quentin has ever done (in fact, he thinks it tops that list. number one — cut boyfriend's hands off. number two — dropped the wards and let the beast destroy alice, thus resulting in kady's death and alice's turning into a niffin. number three — thought about letting what-used-to-be-his-girlfriend kill two of the last people he had left. number four— idolizing plover, who was actually a pedophile. number five — told julia in high school he wanted to die and thus making her worry about him. he thinks it says something about the week he's been having that three-fifths of this list have happened in the past week).

but he does it. in reterospect, it probably would have been easier to use magic, but that kind of magic is battle magic, which means they'd have to ask kady how to do it and he forgets, sometimes, that kady isn't here anymore.

they go to find the questing beast, and they find it (her? them? he? he's not really sure what the correct pronouns for a magical deer are, and he'd been a little caught up with the fact that it couldn't bring alice or kady back to ask). and then after it had said it couldn't, he found himself sobbing on his own in the magical forest he'd always dreamed of because all he really wants is to go home, to go back to when he was a kid and he didn't feel like any of this, but he can't go home. he can't leave penny here alone.

so then the two of them go back to brakebills, and penny leaves for mayakovsky to learn how to do magic again and quentin's just sitting around until julia comes, sobbing and alone, to ask him to help her rob a bank so she can pay someone to help her because kady left her a contact list but nothing of actual value and julia is not exactly wealthy.

and of course he does, and eliot isn't in fillory anymore and he's not really sure how that happened but he's a bit too caught up in robbing a bank to ask, and then eliot gets caught in some kind of magical coma taking a magical bullet for him, and the fact that he let eliot do that rockets its way up to number three on the list of the worst things he's ever done.

then julia needs her shade and quentin is all too happy to help because honestly he'd do anything to not have to think about the fact that almost everyone he's ever loved is gone, even eliot who technically isn't gone so much as trapped (and awake again, thank god) in fillory and they never really said anything about what they sort-of-might've-had because everything got all mixed up and then people were dying and it really wasn't the right time. and alice's shade is here, and she is so much like the alice he loved (he doesn't know why he's thinking that, considering she's part of alice's soul) and then there's a spell and flashing lights and he sees alice again but she's not alice, she's something else, something less human almost and mayakovsky won't let her see him.

so he goes with eliot to save fillory. because he can't have one goddamn week without the magical land of his childhood in peril, apparently.

//

and then once fillory is saved, he goes to visit alice. because he misses her, _damnit_. she's sitting hunched over and quentin just goes, just sits with her, and it's quiet for a long while.

“you used to hum to me,” she murmurs, and quentin nods.

he hums a lot, he used to play cello in high school orchestra (julia played violin. they did a lot of duets. they spent a lot of time together, in retrospect. not that that was a bad thing. they're best friends. or they were? quentin should probably check up on that, considering the last time they spent time together she was helping him save his girlfriend and then she ran off to kill a god. needless to say, this last year has not been exactly typical). he didn't think she'd remember that. it hits him then that he hasn't hummed since kady's death and since alice turned into a creature made of pure magic who wanted to kill them all. which is, frankly, a bit depressing if he thinks about it. but hey, what in his life hasn't been depressing lately?

“will you hum for me now?” she asks, and quentin does, and alice sits, staring at him for a while, and then stands up, reaching for quentin's hand and suddenly they're dancing. it's high-school prom dancing. nothing fancy. which is good because quentin spent most of his high-school prom stepping on julia's toes whenever he tried to do anything fancy.

“i missed this,” she says, and quentin keeps his arms around alice's waist and she keeps swaying like he wasn't just intimately involved in the deaths of two gods.

“missed what?” quentin asks, and it takes alice a long while to respond.

“you humming,” she says. “i traveled stars and galaxies and skies and in all of the universe, there was no one who would hum for me.”

“huh,” quentin says.

“q,” she says again, after a few minutes. quentin finds himself wishing he hadn't abandoned his smartphone after coming to brakebills, because his throat is starting to feel a bit off. he makes the diplomatic choice to ignore it, in favor of savoring alice acting like alice again. “i know what i did. you don't have to walk on eggshells about it. i'm the reason kady's dead.” she pauses, taking a long breath, before continuing. “but we'll get her back. i know we will, q. i know we will. and penny — he's come to see me a few times. i can help him. i used to know how to help him, quentin. i'll learn how to again. i know i can.”

“i believe in you,” quentin says. he's really not sure what else to say. but he knows one thing, and the one thing is this — that even while they're dancing like high-schoolers in the middle of a frozen and empty school and even while his throat is a bit scratchy from all the humming that if any person in the world can bring kady back and fix penny's hands, it's alice. and god, how he has _missed_ her.


End file.
